just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize