I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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