I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.