I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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