Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize