and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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