I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
