Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
