I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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