the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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