Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
