a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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