you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
