I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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