did you get engaged???
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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