Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I enjoy the company of your penis
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
