im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize