i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Randomize
