And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
