At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
