the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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