i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize