Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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