I think I am morally bankrupt
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
