well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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