it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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