don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
you told grandpa to call you daddy
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I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
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Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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