butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize