just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
