Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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