when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
