New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Randomize
