I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
