with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
is this the sara with the beer cane?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
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