Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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