If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
