I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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