Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
