4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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