You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
