We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
