Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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