just tell him i said nine months
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
