im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
