whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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