Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
