he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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