it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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