dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize