matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
